A year goes by

Today, more than any other in a long while, I reflect upon the last year and what it has meant to me. It's still so hard to imagine that Super is no longer here. Yes, he's definitely here in spirit. And yes, his voice laughs like Tyler Durden in my head. And yes, sometimes I think he's watching me (and it freaks me out, in a funny sort of way.) "I know Super, I know, I should use something better than Jergens. I'm on it." :] But there are also days where I feel like I'm in a perpetual dreamlike state - and it's only a matter of time before I snap out of it and come back to the real world and see my friend again.

Alas, this is reality. Though I do mourn in my own way, I think my psyche has actually stepped it up a notch in response to Mario's death. I'm beyond the point of feeling sad for me, I only feel sad for Mario. I don't want to be selfish anymore, I want to acknowledge the things he's not here to do anymore. The things he loved doing, the things that made him laugh, and the things that made him the person he was. The person he always will be. Once again, I find myself staring in the mirror with that mantra, "hey, he's doing *everything* he wants to do now. Get over it, Justin."

I have little reminders tacked throughout my day to day that help keep his name nearby, such as a couple Super Mario miniatures, custom Oakleys, custom Nikes, a photo, and some of his old tees. He's every bit of motivation and inspiration as I would expect him to be. And yet, he still makes me smile. You have to admit that he was pretty bold. Thanks so much Mario, for being such a good friend to me. You're in my thoughts more than you know. Keep your eyes open brother, if all the rest of my years fly right on by as fast as this one...it won't be long before we're laughing it up together again. Love 'ya man. (And yes, I know exactly what you would say to that, haha...)